{"id":1123,"date":"2015-02-25T12:36:21","date_gmt":"2015-02-25T12:36:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/?p=1123"},"modified":"2015-02-25T12:38:33","modified_gmt":"2015-02-25T12:38:33","slug":"lunchtime","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/?p=1123","title":{"rendered":"Lunchtime"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>Today isn&#8217;t a good day. I&#8217;m not feeling well mentaly. I&#8217;ve not got my van today but if I did have it I&#8217;d of gone home to bed. I&#8217;ve layed down on the sofa here instead and slept for about 45 minutes. I might sleep again soon. In my mind I should have this job finished by now and I&#8217;m behind on other plans I&#8217;ve made. I feel like everything is slipping away. I feel weak. \u00a0 The situation at the weekend has weakened me too. I didn&#8217;t even defend my son. I should of. I must not ever let it happen again. I&#8217;d die for my family. I only fear the trouble that will be caused of I do defend them. Better to defend than be a coward. <\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0 \u00a0My head isn&#8217;t in a good place and it&#8217;s really fucking me off because I should be able to control my moods and my thoughts. \u00a0 It&#8217;s a basic thing. I should be able to do it.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong> \u00a0 I&#8217;m tired of my life being an act. I can&#8217;t keep it going much longer. I&#8217;m not that good an actor. Maybe the world is fake too so I&#8217;ll get by. \u00a0I always seem to. What a fucking hole to be in. A shitty hole.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Today isn&#8217;t a good day. I&#8217;m not feeling well mentaly. I&#8217;ve not got my van today but if I did have it I&#8217;d of gone home to bed. I&#8217;ve layed down on the sofa here instead and slept for about 45 minutes. I might sleep again soon. In my mind I should have this job &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/?p=1123\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Lunchtime<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1123","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1123"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1123"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1123\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1126,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1123\/revisions\/1126"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1123"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1123"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1123"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}