{"id":2011,"date":"2019-07-18T06:36:13","date_gmt":"2019-07-18T06:36:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/?p=2011"},"modified":"2019-07-18T06:36:13","modified_gmt":"2019-07-18T06:36:13","slug":"life-and-stress-etc","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/?p=2011","title":{"rendered":"Life and stress etc"},"content":{"rendered":"

Life has been, and continues to be, stressful. \u00a0It\u2019s an ongoing circle. \u00a0I\u2019m becoming and I am a person I don\u2019t like. \u00a0I can\u2019t seem to find a way to break the cyclical things that come up. Each time I think I\u2019ve got a grip they kick me harder. \u00a0I\u2019m considering doing LSD as I\u2019ve heard it can completely cut out depression. \u00a0I\u2019m also thinking of upping my meds to what they were before. \u00a0I spoke with my wife about it last night. \u00a0She said I\u2019m edgy and it\u2019s like walking on eggshells around me. \u00a0I\u2019m wondering if I\u2019m slipping into a mixed episode. \u00a0I\u2019m full on at work but I\u2019m also getting completely worn out and at times crashing as soon as I\u2019m home. Several days last week and the weekend I\u2019ve had to sleep during the day or after work. \u00a0It\u2019s like a switch. \u00a0Lights out. \u00a0Last week would of been my mums birthday, dates are always a trigger. \u00a0I\u2019m at a loss as to how to get a handle on this. \u00a0Am I just overthinking life and situation or am I getting unwell. \u00a0The uncertainty is the unknown and I\u2019m discombobulated. \u00a0The ringing is loud in my ears. \u00a0Hay fever is harsh. \u00a0I\u2019m disinterested in fishing, casting, food growing and often work. \u00a0I want to become a hermit. \u00a0I\u2019ve considered running away but that\u2019s not fair on my family. Suicide wouldn\u2019t be fair either and as crazy as it sounds I made a promise to a friend not to try again and I\u2019m trying to stick to it. \u00a0People have been talking utter bollocks about me and it\u2019s thrown me badly. \u00a0I try fucking hard to be a good person. Really hard. \u00a0Maybe some life decisions will be made soon. \u00a0I really don\u2019t know much these days.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Life has been, and continues to be, stressful. \u00a0It\u2019s an ongoing circle. \u00a0I\u2019m becoming and I am a person I don\u2019t like. \u00a0I can\u2019t seem to find a way to break the cyclical things that come up. Each time I think I\u2019ve got a grip they kick me harder. \u00a0I\u2019m considering doing LSD as I\u2019ve … Continue reading Life and stress etc<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2011","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2011"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2011"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2011\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2012,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2011\/revisions\/2012"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2011"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2011"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2011"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}