{"id":638,"date":"2014-08-11T06:04:43","date_gmt":"2014-08-11T06:04:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/?p=638"},"modified":"2014-08-11T06:07:02","modified_gmt":"2014-08-11T06:07:02","slug":"monday-anxiety-again","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/?p=638","title":{"rendered":"Monday anxiety again"},"content":{"rendered":"

I woke up full of anxiety this morning. I wished that I could be a millionaire and not have to get out of bed. I’d had a few odd \/bad dreams. I think they triggered the anxiety but were also triggered by me being overwrought and overtired. Catch 22. Anyway I’m feeling a bit better now as I’ve focused on being fully present. I’m not fully present but I’m more present than anxious. I had sat here trying to meditate but closed my eyes and tied myself up in mental knots. Everything was too much and I just wanted to go to sleep. My circadian rhythms are out again, probably by over working and being high for too long. In fact I think I’ve had about 5 weeks of being high or being in a full on mixed episode. I’m still in it but I’m trying to very slowly come back down. I think I need some extra rest. I’ve nearly caught up at work again. Hopefully I’ll start to relax a little.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

I bought a kindle book yesterday that is really good. It’s called ‘bipolar happens’ and I highly recommend it. It’s pretty short but has some really good advice and tips in it. I even got my wife to buy it on her iPad. \u00a0I just wish others could understand how I feel sometimes. It always seems that the only people who I think relate to it are other Cyclothymia or bipolar sufferers. I don’t use the word suffer lightly either. I don’t like that it infers a victim or pain but it does involve suffering. \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

Today should be dry so I can get a fair amount done, although I’d expected it to be wet, and I can go a little easy on myself. I’ll not go to work until 8am this morning, in fact I’m going to switch back to that if I can instead of 7:15-7:30am. \u00a0I’m also going to try getting home for 6pm if I can because these last few weeks have taken their toll on me physically , spiritually and mentally. \u00a0I guess I’ll go get on with my day.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I woke up full of anxiety this morning. I wished that I could be a millionaire and not have to get out of bed. I’d had a few odd \/bad dreams. I think they triggered the anxiety but were also triggered by me being overwrought and overtired. Catch 22. Anyway I’m feeling a bit better … Continue reading Monday anxiety again<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-638","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/638"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=638"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/638\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":641,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/638\/revisions\/641"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=638"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=638"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thebipolarbuilder.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=638"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}