I’ve meant to blog for a day or two but someone has tried hacking the website so I’ve not been able to.
Where am I at? Hmmm. The last week was tricky. I have my suspicions as to why. It’s a rollercoaster that’s for sure. I’m almost 46 and am wondering if I’ve become what I never wanted to become in life. I’m wondering if I’m still young or am I already getting old? Am I still capable? I think I am. There’s so much I want to achieve in life. There’s so much I intended to do but things have changed. If at the end of my life people think I’ve lived an average life I’ll be happy. Happy because it means in some ways I’ve remained hidden and happy because what goes on in my head hasn’t escaped too much.
What really is life? Is it simply an imagination? Is it an alien in a virtual reality game playing a character and at death we just remove the headset/blindfold. Maybe I need to get out of my head. Out of it fully and look in. Often I make myself busy doing things but neglect the inner workings. Workings which I used to spend so much time on. Life certainly is circular. Ouroboros. It’s always hidden yet it’s in plain sight. Everything is. Mind gymnastics.
Letting the thoughts run free…hmmm….good or bad I don’t know. What more can I do. What more should I do. What should I strive for. To be a warrior? Life is about all of it.
Thoughts come. Thoughts go. Up and down and all around. Escape is the way.
Maybe leaving earth is the way forwards. I wonder if everyone who’s a deep seated Christian thinks they’re living in the end times like The Book of Revelation. Maybe this is all just my reality and there is no such thing as others. Maybe they’re just part of my imagination. My will as a magician is being tested perhaps. Maybe this path was chosen for me or I chose it. Maybe nothing is real. Maybe everything is possible.
Eh Yeh Asher Eh Yeh.
Autumn is here. Winter is yet to come. The day’s are so short. England is locked down until at least 2nd December. I think it’ll be longer even though it was announced today there’s a vaccine that’s 90% efficient. There’s so much shit going on in the world. I think our lockdown will be extended. There’s a push for The Great Reset. There’s a push for Agenda 21 and Agenda 30. I’ve known about both ‘Agendas’ for a long while. Agenda 21 I knew about a few years back. We are being pushed into a totalitarian world. The UK is now a police state if you look up the definition of it. The police are going by government decisions and guidelines. They’re doing the governments bidding. People are living in fear. They’re having fear pushed upon them by the government and mainstream media. People are scared. It’s wrong. We have a rogue government in England. They’ve lied to the people knowingly and willingly. They’ve falsified the numbers of infections and deaths. They’ve falsified their projected infections. All of this knowingly. It has to be brought to account. We have to be aware of what’s really going on. And yes I sound paranoid but no I’m not. I’m actually well. It’s just there are nefarious plans in place and being acted out. It’s really not good.