Up at 5:45am again. I’m getting used to getting up early. I was later going to sleep too. I’m wondering what today will bring. I’ve already meditated and done my Qigong.
So far I’m feeling kind of numb/normal. I find it strange to not feel emotions much at times and then feel everything good when rising and feel everything bad when dropping off. I feel like a yoyo or a orebody lim swinging from one side to the other, never resting in the middle. Would I even want it to rest in the middle? I don’t honestly know.
Just a thought, but is everything worth the hassle or internal conflict? I’m not sure I have a choice or if I have a way to stop it. I certainly try being very aware, very present.
