Its Friday evening already and I’m feeling ok today. Yesterday was a shocking day. I hasuch rage all day. I wanted to kill or hurt people. I was livid. I was fuming. Luckily I calmed myself down. I needed to.
Anyway today has been ok. Tonight will be ok. I will be ok. Everyone else can just deal with it. One thing that has flared up today is my hay fever. That can really batter me badly. Anyway I’m sat indoors now as the pollen is high. I’m drinking cider too. My wife bought me a couple of bottles. She bought herself a bottle of wine. Maybe tomorrow I’ll buy a few bottles of wine for myself and get hammered. I feel like it. Anyway for tonight the cider will do.
So tomorrow I needto clear more of my dads house the closer it gets toning c,ear the harder it is. It’s the house I grew up in. It was always my place of safety. It’s where I lived pretty much 3/4 of my life so far. Also what’s hard is it’s the last remnant I have of my dad. Once it’s cleared it’ll be handed back to the council and someone else will move in and life will have to move on. I know my wife doesn’t get it. She has moved several times in her life, even in childhood. Plus her parents a still alive and in their 80’s. My mum died aged 53 and now my dad aged 74. I just don’t think she gets it at all. Oh well. That’s life. So tomorrow will be hard. I’ll go there on my own and start clearing things. Lots of the furniture nobody wants so I will end up having to scrap it or break it up and dispose of it. A whole life in boxs, bags and the rubbish dump, how very sad that is.