Anxiety is a bitch

Huge anxiety again over several things. I’m still awaiting a payment from someone. There’s a couple of snags on a job that are easily sorted but also one which I can’t get my head around. Money is non existent and I’ve still not paid the mortgage. People think running a business is a money making machine but a very small business is often far from that.  It’s famine and feast with mostly famine.  I’m not sure what I can do to change things as my head isn’t quite right.  I’ve got meds again and am seriously considering going up to a slightly higher dose again.  I’ll see once they kick in again at this dose. Death is strong in my mind in many ways.  A friend phoned last night to check on me.  I’ve not had that happen before.  I’m touched by it.  He’s a good guy.  I’m just not used to it I guess.  I walk a lonely path. Maybe it’s time to broaden that pathway. 

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