I woke at 4:50am this morning but went back to sleep until 6am so I guess I’ve had a lay in. I had a few strange dreams last night. Dreams where there were situations completely out of my control. Situations that I was involved in and needed to be able to have control over them. I’m not sure if this is an analogy of my mind at the moment. I’m certainly working to master my mind now. I’m not anxious about these dreams, although they did disturb my sleep a good amount. Maybe I need to keep an eye on my moods.
Dreaming as I did last night I’m wondering if there are many people who are truly happy in life. They say ignorance is bliss. They may well be right. The more I strive to be a better version of myself the harder it seems at times. I guess if you’re ignorant of the higher calling of self knowledge or other knowledge and wisdom then things may seem better. I’m never sure when my thinking is rational or when the Cyclothymia is causing a change in my thinking. Quite often it’s too late before I know the difference. I certainly know that it’s good to search oneself for ones higher better person. It’s not always easy though to feel that the world isn’t conspiring against you or your efforts. I guess I’ll just keep going forwards. Actually it’s not a case I’ve guessing, it’s a case of I will keep pushing forwards because I want to and because it leads to self improvement.
I have a reasonably busy day ahead today so I guess I’d better get on with it. I’ll make it a good day, a happy day.
