It’s Thursday once again or Thors day. Day of Jupiter. It’s beautiful clear cool autmn day out there and I think it’s going to be a lovely day. I’m looking forwards to the day ahead. Im feeling pretty good and I think I’ve been feeling a little inspired lately too. Maybe wisdom is finally setting in with age. Well it certainly sounds nice when I say it. The birds are singing already too. Early bird and worm etc. My life’s fortunes seem to be turning. That’s good. Life is a blessing. Life just is. It’s what we make of it or what we see that’s important I guess. If we see doom, we attract doom. It’s not easy to fully understand this all the time though. Sometimes things really are tough. It’s the tough times that make or break us. It’s the tough times that define us. It’s the tough times that make the good times good. It’s hard to put it down in words fully. Life just is. Is that enough? I think it is. People die each day and new people are born each day. Life just is.
I’m trying to work through myself to find out who I truly am. It’s part self psychology and part ritual magic. I want to discover ‘the real me’ inside of here. I know that I percie myself through others interpretations of my, from others projections upon me, from my parents rules and ideals when growing up, but that’s not the truest essence of who I am. ‘I’ am much more than that and much deeper than that. The ‘I’ that is the true self is in here somewhere. I need to understand ‘my’ thinking and how and why it is how it is. It’s not for everyone, although it could be. Self analysis is possibly the best form of therapy. Who can know you better than yourself? Who ever tells a therapist everything? I don’t honestly believe that it’s possible to do that. I believe it’s impossible because our thoughts change and unless we live full time with a therapist then it’s impossible. I’m not saying a very good therapist can’t and doesn’t help. I’m not suggesting others go against that. I’m talking from my own perspective and opinion. I think only I can know myself fully, openly and honestly. I’m looking forwards to my retreat so that I can find more of my true self again. I honestly believe my solitary retreat earlier this year helped me to start to fully understand myself and how I’m a little different. Let the good work continue I say.
