Sometimes I feel like screaming

I wish I could scream and shout. Externally I can seem calm and relaxed but I side I feel like shouting, screaming and telling everyone how I see it. Why can’t we do it? Why is it such a taboo? Why do I wear a mask often if not all of the time? Why do I have so many fears? Why ?

I’m tired of it all. It’s too tiring. I need lots of rest. I want to go to sleep for a long while. I want to do things too. I’m too overwrought with it all it’s all too much. I’ve had enough. Enough is enough.

Yesterday and today I’ve had a kind of meltdown. On the outside, to most, I probably didn’t or don’t seem much different at all. I guess that’s just the nature of the beast. I’m feeling mixed that’s for sure. Maybe I’m on the edge of the precipice looking down instead of up. Maybe I’m heading down. 

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